ADHD with or without PD

On By Andi BrownIn Uncategorized

To give you a sense of what it’s like living with ADHD, let’s take inventory, shall we?

Over the last 35 years or so, I have lost approximately

15 pairs of sunglasses (counts double because some were prescription and therefore very expensive)

42 pairs of gloves

5 hats

6 sweaters, including some I knit myself

A whole bunch of scarves

Ditto socks though I suspect that’s universal

1 pajama top

11 phone chargers

99 umbrellas

3 cameras including one that I left on a table in the store in Madrid featuring the designer that a stylish friend liked. Guess I’ll just have to return to Spain to retrieve it, as I have a huge sentimental attachment to that little cutie of a pre-cell phone picture-taker (yeah, right.)

Manner of disappearance

Left on floor or seat in movie theater (2,653 total number of things)

Left on cosmetics counter

Abandoned in store dressing room

Accidental placement in wrong location, e. g. glasses in wastebasket, glasses in linen closet, glasses in laundry basket and the time I carried a bottle of dishwashing liquid to work

Left on table or floor or chair or bathroom in restaurant

Left at friend’s house

Left in vehicle: car (friend’s), car (ride share),subway, train, airport, train station, which reminds me, I left out a category of items lost: books. As in, ordered food at airport Starbucks, put book on counter to free hands for gathering muffin and coffee, went to bathroom, lined up to board flight, located and assumed seat, started to relax, ready for takeoff and …WTF! Where’s my book? And so it begins. And sadly, never ends.

Now imagine that you’re in your home and you’ve decided to hop down to the gym in your building for a quick turn on the treadmill. But where’s the damn key to the gym? Where it isn’t is the bowl on the hall table it calls home. Kitchen? Nope. Bathroom? Uh uh. Now I’m trekking a circuit of my quite petite apartment in search of said door opener. The longer I search, the faster I move and the more agitated I become. I decide to take a walk outside, maybe treat myself to my favorite breakfast sandwich at the coffee shop on the corner. If I can calm down even the teensiest bit, I will figure this out.

Who am I kidding? I will never relax until that key – now no longer just a door opener but also the metaphorical entree to my sanity- appears in my hot little hand.

An hour goes by. I find some stuff to do online, pace a few more times. I am now physically and emotionally exhausted.

I look over and notice that the hall closet is slightly ajar. I get up to close it and wait! Did I look in YOUR pocket, Ms. Black Wool Coat purchased for a song at Barney’s going-out-of-business sale? Apparently not, for there lay the key sweetly ensconced in her woolen nest. Now imagine a rerun of this scene several times a week. This losing stuff results in a near-constant state of anxiety: How can I relax enough so I can read, write or watch TV? I can’t.

Plus, God knows how much money I’ve spent over the years replacing stuff.

Let me disabuse you right now of any notion that this propensity to lose things is in any way part of a ditzy charm. There’s plenty of ditz, very little charm. Lucy I am not.

I was always a decent student, though I’m pretty sure I wasn’t reaching my full potential academically. I do recall a year, in maybe seventh or eighth grade, when I was prescribed Dexadrine (aka speed) “to help me focus.” I don’t know why this treatment was stopped. but I sometimes wish it hadn’t been. Maybe this plague of inattention might have been averted.

Interestingly, studies have found that individuals with ADHD have a 2-4 times higher risk of developing Parkinson’s compared to the general population. Aha! An explanation of, well, something. Not that that information does me much good at the moment, except to reinforce what I’ve suspected for some time: Parkinson’s exacerbates ADHD. It may not be true in my case but that’s my story and I’m stickin’ to it.

A wise friend who seems to have conquered her own ADHD has recommended a webinar series on dealing with my issues. With one episode down, and my starting to deploy some of the suggested tips and tricks, I’m cautiously optimistic. Still, there may be some sort of ADHD coach in my future.

So here I sit at 74 goddamn years old, attempting to learn new habits that will allow me to proceed through my days with purpose and calm. Bye bye state of frenzy! Hello, tranquility, or at least something close to it.

Earlier today, I couldn’t find my favorite pair of reading glasses. Instead of giving in to the turmoil in my head, I reminded myself that it’s a new day in my brain. Now I just sit back, try to relax, and B R E A T H E.

Parky Conversations, a podcast about Parkinson’s

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4 thoughts on “ADHD with or without PD”

  2. Unknown's avatar Anonymous

    As always, I love your latest blog. My latest – my beloved tweezers escaped recently. I’ve had them for decades, always left them in the same spot and GONE, no where to be found. Please check your black wool coat.

    I just finished reading a sample of Lisa Genova’s book, Remember: The Science of Memory and the Art of Forgetting. Sounds like a possibility for understanding memory and memory help. Andrea

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Unknown's avatar Anonymous

    Ever since I dropped my passport, my wallet stuffed with 700 Euros freshly retrieved from the Florence airport ATM, and 2 credit cards, into the gutter as I stepped out of a taxi having arrived at my hotel, , UNBEKNOWNST TO ME AT THE TIME and never to be found no matter how many times I went back to that spot to search….. I keep everything – wallet, glasses, keys, gloves, etc. attached by carabiner lanyards to my pocketbooks. Clumsy, but it’s worked for years.

    Like

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