You might be expecting me to tell you I’d had it with all the redundant questionnaires, the symptom diaries, the schlepping to and from the hospital for assorted pokings and proddings, and the endless queries from friends and acquaintances about the scientific underpinnings of the project. Folks, I practically flunked freshman biology. I have the type of brain that thrives on a diet of Thomas Hardy, Sue Grafton and Joseph Finder:

I was experiencing a worsening of symptoms, largely tremors . My neurologist wanted to treat the worsening symptoms by changing meds but alas, doing so would render me ineligible for the trial. Or that was how I understood the situation.

Before signing on to the clinical trial, I was advised that I had to be consistently on the same Parkinson’s medications for at least two months and that I could not be considered for Deep Brain Stimulation (DBS) surgery should a determination be made that I would benefit. And finally, that I probably wouldn’t know if I’d received the real treatment or a placebo for around 18 months. (If I’m a little fuzzy on the details, well, see almost flunked bio, )

And withdrawing from the trial might also have the benefit of allowing me to consider Deep Brain Stimulation surgery, which might address the increase in tremors but which was disallowed by the trial.

Sometime in the middle of my decision-making process, I learned that I could change meds sooner and still participate in the trial but by then I’d already come to the conclusion that I’d made the best choice. While the amount of time spent on trial- related activities was greater than I’d anticipated and frankly sometimes annoying, that wasn’t a factor in my decision to withdraw. Truthfully, participating in the trial was both interesting and actually kind of fun, and I liked knowing that something I was doing might benefit other people with PD

I will confess I did experience some relief that jumping through clinical trial hoops was behind me, at least for now. It’s back to the regular PD irritants, probably no more or less troublesome than the various conditions most of my friends are experiencing.

But, after months of in-person interviews, zoom calls, MRIs, PET scans, a crazily-planned trip to Long Island, a rather depressing-bordering-on-creepy motel stay, all systems were go.

Now you’re yelling, “But wait! This is PD. Anything can happen.” You guessed it, anything did. Specifically, the aforementioned worsening of symptoms.

Which brings me – as do many mental meanderings- to the solution of many a conundrum: the spreadsheet, probably my favorite aspect of tech. I shall reveal my latest tech creation next time. Stay tuned and happy summer!